The Gift of Moments

There really is no good way to express the concept of moments other than to live them. Then again, why would I try to express the concept of moments to something that doesn't exist? Even a rock has moments, it just lacks sentience to respond to the moments and it lacks self-awareness to contemplate the effect of moments on it's existence.
However, many people live a baneful existence in the name of vanity. The manner of how moments play out in their lives means nothing more than the next event. This can be seen in those who are selfish enough to only think about accumulating wealth and it can also be seen in people who live to destroy the moments of others; which isn't quite the same as schadenfreude, but it's close enough. (btw, schadenfreude means taking pleasure in the misfortune of others, it isn't the same as causing that misfortune or even taking pleasure in causing the misfortune)

I will never fully understand the nature of living for the purpose of self-fulfillment. I have always looked at such a thing as the most depraved kind of existence there is. It is great to be the king of the mountain, but what does it mean when you trash the whole world just to get to the top? Furthermore, who cares about the person at the peak when that person isn't trying to pull others up with them?
I have argued with many people that there are times when a selfish attitude means the difference of helping others out, because it is my core belief that sacrifice is the noble method to help others. There is no nobility in preying on the meek or innocent just to help out those who are favored. You hear so much about this in politics, yet it is those same politicians who won't give up their security and their fortunes to display the seriousness of their words. I've never heard of a noble King that doesn't sacrifice their life for their subjects, only tyrants who rule with the promise of freedom, security, and prosperity: at the cost of the lives of others.

Most of the time, in my adult life, I have found that I am more concerned with moments as they happen for other people as opposed to for myself. I really don't get bent out of shape about what is offensive to me, I put more energy into not perpetuating the offense. I have always felt greatly shaped by the way others feel my actions portray my character as, which is not to say I am worried about misconceptions. What I'm saying is that there's a difference of me being myself regardless of how it affects others, as opposed to me caring that I let my actions bring out the best about myself. I'm not perfect, no person is, but I don't have to let my imperfections rule my behavior. It seems even more foolish not to strive to improve the imperfections themselves.

How many times a day do we people get caught up in results and forget about the process?
Does the process ever yield results that are not exact to the process itself?
Is there reason that the process is truly irrelevant?
Oddly enough.. I think there are times when the process is irrelevant, that only results matter. However, that would be in the context of extremes. I don't find it to be true in relevance to dealing with the emotions of people or striving to be noble. In fact, I think it is that kind of thinking that is lacking a polarization to put it into perspective. It isn't quite a truism, it's not a good idiom, and it is illogical in many ways.
Anyone who thinks this way is caught up by the gears of vanity and crushed in the clockwork of insanity, the irony being that insanity has some systematic process to begin with.

For the majority of people who want to be immortal, there is no way to achieve that in this world. Even legends die off in the sands of time, their meaning lost in antiquity as even those who held the lore with esteem are also lost to the newcomers of the world. What then shall a man think of his own moments being of great status if his life itself isn't recognized even a generation beyond his own progeny?
Which makes the gift of moments all the more sacred.
Thinking about the future of our descendants isn't the method to keep our own moments sacred. The only way to do that is to live for a purpose that transcends time, regardless if it is practiced throughout time itself.

I look at my life and my emotional concerns and I see the same thing perpetuated from ages ago. How did I come to be this way is as much a mystery as how certain etiquette is absolute to the Human race. This is something that Naturalists will never be able to surmount with their appeal to naturalistic methods. Which I find a frivolous debate, considering the nature of how etiquette should have changed with intellectual sophistication; even though it remains constant when you appeal to divine authority.
My point isn't about morals or religious etiquette though. My point is about the importance of moments, it just makes more sense to give moments sacredness when valuing the the human condition of self-awareness. We humans go so far as to give the sacredness of moments to other living creatures and even to the non-sentient elements. Perhaps it is because we understand the lasting value of consequences from our actions, which can be heavily determined by our value of moments. Just another example of the transcending value the certain absolutes have to all life regardless of it's form.

In the end, the Gift of Moments means more than just appreciating what you are doing or who you are doing it with. The appeal to enjoying yourself and to helping others enjoy themselves is important, but it is meaningless if it creates devastation for the moments of the future. In fact, it would seem to justify what some may call the punishment of Karma.. Or like I love to hear, retribution.
So make the best of every moment, even if you have to learn to appreciate the value of sacrifice.

The Dream of Equality

I find it very relevant to post something about Equality and the ideologies surrounding it in the mainstream. Most of my desire to talk about this is because of my own life experiences with the state of Equality and also the nature in which people are getting really heated, in America, about the Marriage Equality hearings going on in the Supreme Court.
I'd like to point out that I am not making a call to stand in a certain direction, I'd rather be respectful to all sides since I think there are very reasonable people when you get past all the rhetoric and fanatics.

Being of mixed ethnicity, I have to deal with the outward expression of what I am involuntarily. This outward expression isn't acceptable to all people, be it that I am of mixed ethnicity or be it that I am mixed with a certain ethnic background. Since my earlier childhood memories, I have been recognized for what I really am and treated in a host of different ways because of individual perception of what I should be defined as. To my own horror, as a kid, the people who fight most for equality are usually the ones least tolerant.
I don't say this lightly.. I think Martin Luther King was a great advocate of peaceful demonstrations and to share in a worldly vision of mankind being peaceful with each other regardless of what they look like. However, I hate that people turn Martin Luther King's dream into a message of African American Empowerment, MLK wasn't advocating for one side regardless of what people believe his 'fight' to be about. The same goes for many other Equal rights activists who share in a dream where people are treated like people and the only differences that deserve discrimination are actions.
I don't see the logic in treating the great leaders of Equality as voices for one demographic, it defeats the purpose of what they were aiming to do.

There are a few other things about me that have undergone the discrimination that society is calling out against. I don't find these other things to be as important in my life since I can hide them from public view. However, I can't say that I find the struggle itself to be relevant to my goals since I don't rely on my private affairs being public like some people do. That may make it seem like I don't care about the struggle itself, but that is not accurate. I simply don't agree with what everyone is saying because some things don't need to be public affairs. When it comes to equal marriage, I think that is a legitimate struggle because it's depraved to force people to live in secrecy when it isn't harming anyone (be it themselves only if that truly is the case. Take all the oddball sexual kinks out there, I don't need to fight it for public approval even though I'm not going to support public ridicule).
I try to adhere to the principle that the fight for equality means relinquishing polemic arguments or slandering information about people. This is for the same reason that MLK made his whole action plan around, because I think there are a few great leaders of history that have shown the importance of your mentality in your struggle. For instance, anyone can agree that it is a contradiction to fight intolerance with intolerance. Just as it is a contradiction to kill a mother who had an abortion for the reason that she had supposedly 'murdered' an innocent person.
Adding fuel to the fire is the method that most people would like to adhere to. It is a clear sign of people who hide their destructive behavior under the guise of prosperity and compassion. The reality is that they are compassionate towards their toys and want prosperity for all toys. That is maniacal and tyrannical.

My basis for equality is in the same category as the 3 Points to the Foundation.
Love, Leadership, & Strength.
To be blunt.. You can't even get to the foundation if you don't know Love. At that point, Leadership and Strength have no meaning. Without Love, there is no compassion. Without compassion there is no understanding. Without understanding there is no cooperation. Without cooperation there is no growth. Without growth there is no life. And we all know what fills in the gap in the absence of life.

There is another problem though, it has to do with the source of moral integrity. I see this problem come up most with people who misunderstanding the premise of their moral understanding or those who can't identify a universal truth. The odd thing to me is that it correlates with a specific set of problems that make it hard for anyone to believe there is anything such as a universal truth. Irony would have it that these same people argue that morality is subjective yet they strive for a universal truth like equality. Interesting contradiction..
The fact of the matter is that no person is Equal to another person by virtue of human existence defining such through physical attributes and mentality. Aside from the obvious differences brought about by gender, thus making experiences subjective to the core of family (arguably the most important facet of the human experience), there are differences in age and birth order and appearance and intellectual capacity and emotional capacity and work ethic and even genetic disposition to disorders/diseases. The idea of individuality is so stark that equality can't exist if you are a naturalist. You have to adhere to the principle of duality to understand the deeper makeup of the human experience that brings us all together in Equality. It's not a joke.. I am not apologizing for offending anyone considering themselves a naturalist, because I find that ideology flawed and detrimental in these kinds of struggles.
If you can't accept the fact that human sentience is universal, in the aspect that we are simply embodied energy that is self aware and also capable of showing respect despite differences in physical attributes, you are bound to make the mistake of classifying people based on physical attributes instead of actions. This is extremely important to know the difference of because physical attributes are suggestive, they aren't the end result of volition. Just like a father can drop his masculine pride and ignore societal roles by becoming the maternal figure in the family, a short man can play basketball by challenging the notion that the taller you are the better chances you'll have! Even Charles Darwin had to affirm that idea by his mentioning that it isn't strength that determines the survival of a race in the gene pool; the logic is that perception of a strong attribute isn't the same as a true advantage.

Ok, with that rant out of the way.. I'd like to focus on the importance of Equality because it may seem like I'm making more of an argument against it. I'm not playing the Devil's Advocate, laying out the argument as a whole is necessary to be open minded. I don't care much for that pseudo tolerance society teaches.

Despite the obvious differences between any individual, there is that awesome similarity that we could call the seat of our experiences. Which is the conscious being behind all the flesh. I am not stepping into the realm of metaphysics when I say that science has been able to show a clear difference between the energy of the nervous system and the conscious mind. Though science hasn't been able to define what the consciousness is by virtue of substance, it has determined it to be a force that directs the core animated qualities of the body (I say it that way because we don't consciously control the body on every level) and is responsible for the patterns in the nervous system that are expressed throughout the body. The end result is amazing, because it is like the conscious experience is on the surface of the body even though it originates from the deepest aspect.
Because of this endowment of consciousness, each human is able to recognize the consciousness of other humans. It comes intuitively, only in our older years do we pay attention to the mechanisms as well as the profound nature that is sentience. We see it in other life forms and because of this quality of life energy coupled with sentience we are able to find something sacred about the experience of living. It helps that we aren't able to give credit of life to some inanimate object that has no value in the grander scheme of things. Even the naturalist must admit that the Universe is truly an awe inspiring place that deserves to be explored and respected (yeah, there I go again bashing you naturalists. Get over it, you have to understand the implications of your views to those who have experienced what you call the metaphysical).
Once you are able to recognize sacredness in any form, especially that of life, you have to start to consider what it means to withhold this recognition from something that deserves it. In fact, the effect of denying someone who feels they deserve it is much more profound. The reaction may be violent, an ironic event where they haven't denied sacredness in retaliation even though they are bent on a path of destruction because of their own perception of being denied value.

Is this starting to become clear at all?

Equality is a farce on the surface, but Humans experience something much deeper than the surface. Because of the human experience there is a conflict of definition. It is by virtue of being revealed the nature of humans that a true understanding can be reached. This understanding is so important that it breaks the bondage of hate and greed and many other conceivable evils/vices. Yet it begs the bigger question, "What did people do before this aspect of the human experience was revealed with certainty?"
Well.. If you look at history... Most people knew exactly what the truth is, they just preferred an alternate ideology. One that allowed them to control people with the concept of superiority through birthright.
If it wasn't because you're born to the royal class (or whatever superior class that goes down the line), it must be because of the shape of your genitals, the color of your skin, the length of a body part, the sound of your voice, the capacity of a preferred skill, or simply the land you were first seen. Every single thing is pyre for a fire of self destruction. Societies that are built on these concepts fall inevitably and people who subconsciously judge others based on these reasons are bound to create instability and insecurities in their families.
Don't be quick to assume that equality is the way to Utopia. There is a line within equality that can be crossed where moral truth is lost and entitlement becomes absolute.

Giving people the chance to prove their worth is not the way. Everyone has value.. However, giving everyone the chance to make something of that value is a state of equality. That is a precept when dealing with legalism; you prove what injustice was committed before assuming guilt. When it comes to judging people on a daily basis, it is not the judgement which is a vice because it is the twisting of reality to fit a bias that nullifies equalities.
When you tell someone else that they have to accept what people do and that they have to go so far as to support it, you've taken away the right to judge actions. I don't have to be ok with what someone does, even though I feel I have to give that person recognition of their natural value. Those are two very different things and it can be perverted to mean all sorts of rhetorical garbage.

Take away someone's value as a person, you show discrimination that crosses a line of moral truth.
Judge people by their actions while maintaining that they have value, you uphold Integrity and Justice.

What really matters is Integrity and Justice, not comfort and freedom.
Genuine Nobility will serve comfort and freedom to those who uphold Integrity and Justice fairly.

Grow Damnit!

"The tiny seed knew in order to grow..

It needed to be dropped in dirt..

Covered in darkness..

And struggle to reach the light."

I came across this saying and was absolutely amazed with the significance it has to humankind in a world of suffering. The need for maturity is much beyond saying what will help us be successful in business or with family. For the most part, we have to acknowledge that it is by failure that we learn the way to success. Otherwise I contend that it is not success that led someone to where they wanted, it was simply a hand-out.
Now I don't mean to come down on anyone who has inherited anything or to say that if you don't bleed and sweat for your success that it doesn't mean anything.. In fact, I believe those things to be a blessing that we should be very careful to be good stewards over. However, I am suggesting that we change our mindset on what suffering is all about.

In my own experiences, I have gone through a lot of suffering emotionally. I have had to endure the painful childhood of confusion of a mixed ethnicity, divorcing parents, being bullied, failing to be understood by teachers, religious/spiritual scrutiny, workforce discrimination, failed relationships, financial hardship, moral upheaval, and near-death events.
I do not consider myself to have had a hard life, because I was born to a nurturing family in an era of relative peace and in a country that isn't plagued with a health crisis out of the hands of the individual. Furthermore, I have confidence in my abilities and I am far from feeling like I can't make a difference in my own life. Having been in the presence of poverty of 3rd world countries, I know that the poorest I've been is nothing in comparison to the average of most people in the world around me. Having seen debilitating diseases affect people who didn't ask for the affliction, I know nothing I've gone through is nearly as crippling emotionally (especially since it didn't cripple me physically). Having seen the effect of abusive parents on many of my friends and strangers, I know I am very fortunate to have been born to the people I was.
In short.. I know my suffering is legitimate, but it isn't extreme.

Through a short time of three years, I've come to some radical conclusions of life that I couldn't force myself to realize in the twenty years prior. Sometimes I forget to recognize that many people are in a tough place in life that prevents them from reaching the light that will transform their lives. As much as it may seem I am trying to suggest what the light is, I'm not. There are many things in which we can say the light is.. I don't know what all the light really is. However, I absolutely know the things in which it is not.

One thing that I love about Metaphors and Allegories is how well it works with my intuition. I have a terribly hard time making sense of things in a linear fashion only because I don't think in such a way. I have an easy time making them up and I am easily hindered by people who explain things only as they are seen or heard because I am a kinesthetic thinker with a strong empathic sense.
I'm sure some people might call me an Indigo Child just because I fit every description, but I prefer to stay away from all that since I don't want to separate myself from the world as if I'm on a superior track of evolution. Though it might be fundamentally true, I don't know if it is or isn't a matter of fact. The point is that regardless of what I am or where I'm at, I understand the value of something...

That something is the struggle of life. 

What is the nature of compassion? The nature of mercy? The nature of forgiveness?
How do all of those three things coincide in the same 'frequency' of the mind, ultimately affected by the heart and equally affecting the emotions of our future? Is it some kind of coincidence that when a person understands the struggle of that little seed, even if it does turn into a hideous weed, that the person still seeks to help that little seed become a useful part of the 'ecosystem'?
Those are a lot of questions, but they are all going somewhere because they all mean the same thing.
I don't want to stress the point that we, as a race, should be striving to obtain some higher understanding of ourselves through some misguided attempt to love everything around us (though it really doesn't hurt to make that a goal). What I am stressing at is the nearly obscene nature of maturity.
I wish I could find an example of a great leader or prophet who didn't struggle to the light. I wish I could find an example of pure innocence in this world, just as much as I wish it could correlate to perfection or an absence of chaos anywhere in it's timeline. As offensive as it may be perceived, I don't see anything in this world as innocent, fully mature, or perfect.

One notion that I stick to is that no matter how old we are when we die, even if we see triple digits to our age, we are never done growing. An old man can be taught, the enlightened can continue to see more light, and no one ever reaches a state of Omniscience.
It seems like a tragedy to the human race that the next generation is no better off than the last despite the growing amount of sophistication in this world. I suppose there are facets that they are, but it doesn't equate to a fulfilling life where they only have to maintain what they are given instead of desperately trying to grow out of darkness and see the light in the same manner of their predecessors. Such a thing seems to be a cruel joke to life itself.

I have resolved myself not to be content with mediocrity and I have also resolved myself not to worry about the struggle of everyone else being vanity. I know there are countless amounts of people who live in vain, never finding the light even to their last moments in this physical existence. I know there is much suffering globally that no amount of money, hedonism, or enlightenment can change permanently. I know that half of the struggle in life is to help ourselves first before we can ever hope to help anyone else. And I know that being resolved about certain things has consequences that brings more suffering.
Yet I'm becoming less interested in a fight that is against nature because I am finding value in understanding that there is an ego that ensnares the true self with the lie that we can bring an external change without first addressing what is inevitable and necessary.

If it must be said, my point is that we organisms are going to grow or die. It is one or the other, it can't be both. There is an exception to this rule.. We can see it in biology in the form of the physiological response to danger. Though most people wouldn't know the difference, because we are conditioned to live this way, we have two main modes our physical bodies operate. It is either in "Protection" mode or it is in "Growth" mode.  The easiest way to understand this is how the body shuts off a lot of functions that facilitate growth when their is a perception of danger. On top of that, the body begins a process that enables 'super' human feats when in "Protection" mode. The most obvious is the Maternal response to protect offspring; an obvious trump of the Fight response over Flight even if it means self destruction. Furthermore, it is in these moments we hear about fragile little creatures overpowering their normally dominating environments or predators and we even see a change of behavior that we would never conceive to be normal without the danger.
Then, like some waving of a magical wand, when the danger has subsided the body shuts off the "Protection" mode and things return to normal: feed, grow, reproduce.
There is a lot of Hard Science behind this.. I don't think it would do any justice to the facts to try to explain it here. I just figured it needed to be summarized to make my point more clear.

Now I can pull it all together..
Though we fight to grow, our struggle is not our testament to our suffering, we also forget that growing is a struggle in itself. Do not let affliction be the method to growth, let it be the testament for the need to continue to struggle. Fight when it is necessary because growth has turned to death, don't let your life be a testament of being nothing more than war.

Obtrude Schadenfreude Eschewed

Here I go with the use of complicated words that no one understands. Even when I look at it I get the feeling I'm using a language that isn't English. I find that little quirk about myself to be rather amusing.

I suppose all I was saying in the Blog Title is, "Unwelcomed Pleasure of Someone's Misfortune Intentionally Avoided". It's just that saying it like that isn't as much fun and it doesn't convey the same point.. What I was trying to convey is that the boastful attention of someone's misfortune, and the pleasure of it, should be avoided.
In all seriousness to my point, there really isn't much effort from most people to maintain compassion, mercy, and forgiveness. For the most part there is a stronger adherence to bitterness, wrath, and gossip. It starts to become a guilty pleasure at the expense of someone's misfortune. Sometimes it is a complete stranger, but often times it is someone who we have a grudge against.

To no avail people must fight the instinctual nature to project an attitude of, "You got what you deserve".
Sometimes the bigger question is.. "Why the hell should I care?"
Ok.. In some ways I really don't want to argue the emotional appeal to such behavior, it's just that it doesn't do anyone good to act like it doesn't matter. Hate breeds negativity and negativity is like a infected wound; nothing heals and the pain only becomes worse. One way or another, you end up spreading the infection and now everyone is perpetuating the pain as if it were even a big deal to begin with.

It is disturbing enough when you come across someone who has a pure and unmotivated sense of pleasure in the misfortune of other people. I don't know if that would fall into the Psychological disorder of Psychopathy, but I think those kind of people are rare enough that it isn't worth focusing my point around. The people that exist more regularly are people who are motivated by some factors to revel in someone else's misfortune while crying about their own.
I don't care how minor the misfortune is, such as losing a phone or failing to humor a friend. The act itself starts small and grows based on the individual's response to their behavior. The fact of the matter is that the concern for people becomes numbed over time. Even worse are people who put conditions for how or even if they will be concerned for others. Those who are in a position of leadership should be especially careful about how they respond to the misfortune of an enemy. There's no guarantee that the people you are leading become offended by your response, especially if they see it as a sign of weakness or a contradiction to what principles you lead by.
A good example of people who I see do this the most...? Religious people. I don't know if these people are just especially prone to the idea that people get what they deserve, but I have noticed an uncanny disconnection to sincere and unconditional compassion. Call me crazy... I just find it ironic that most of these people stand for peace, love, and joy... Yet they mock a person when they are that their most vulnerable.

I wont say I am not guilty of the same thing.. In fact, it is my guilty nature that compels me to refrain. I know how easy it is to feel a justification for my mockery, but there is also something about it that is unsatisfying. My intuition is enough to tell me that the detriment to mocking someone while they suffer is linked to my own perception of the people who do it to me; or rather the emotions I go through..
Revenge somehow goes high up on the list of priorities when I perceive mockery; when it is during times of vulnerability I think there should be a stronger word to describe the anger fueled vindictive bitterness that overcomes me.
All the more reason to be transformed in my way of thinking instead of just attacking the problem at the surface. This is also the reason why I advocate to others to do the same.

Endure the mockery, but don't be the mocker.

Surprise! You're experiencing Disdain!

If the title of this post didn't convey an extreme sense of cynical joy, then let me put it out there that I intended such. I am commonly known to be full of cynicism to illustrate my feelings about situations that are anything but joyful expressions of the treasures of life. Don't get me wrong though, I look at it as a treasure chest of trash that can incite something truly wonderful in an individual's growth.. So the trash may be undesired but it really is treasure if you know what to do with the trash inside the treasure chest that we may prefer to call: Pandora's Box. 

This blog title is really important to something we all can relate to in this broken-state of a world. Surprise can be fun, exciting in a dangerous way, or outright unpleasant  I can't think of any kind of positive attribute about Disdain in itself, but I can think of many ways that Disdain can bring about greatness in individuals.
First, for the laymen, let us get a clear understanding of what the two things are and how they come to bring clarity of my idea when used together like I did in the title.

sur·prise Verb /sə(r)ˈprīz/ 
surprising present participle; surprised past tense;surprises 3rd person singular present; surprisedpast participle

1. (of something unexpected) Cause (someone) to feel mild astonishment or shock

• I was surprised at his statement

• Joe was surprised that he enjoyed the journey

• she was surprised to learn that he was forty

1. Capture, attack, or discover suddenly and unexpectedly; catch unawares

• he surprised a gang stealing scrap metal

 dis·dain Verb /disˈdān/ 
disdains 3rd person singular present; disdained past participle;disdaining present participle; disdained past tense

1. Consider to be unworthy of one's consideration

• gamblers disdain four-horse races

1. Refuse or reject (something) out of feelings of pride or superiority

• she remained standing, pointedly disdaining his invitation to sit down

• he disdained to discuss the matter further

Disdain is a bit more tricky to articulate than Surprise because most people don't realize they are exhibiting the qualities of what defines Disdain unlike what defines Surprise. Perhaps the reason behind it is because the word Disdain is not used frequently enough with the layman, the comparison to the common usage of Surprise is unbelievably stark. Moreover, most people would rather use a word like uncomfortable or anger or disgust. Though disgust is similar to despise and despise is synonymous with disdain.

Now I'm going to give an example of when someone is Surprised by their Disdaining experience.

Disillusionment from Betrayal.

Come on.. Tell me you haven't experienced betrayal before. I can't think of anyone who doesn't come to know the meaning of betrayal. Most people know the depth of how it can bring despair, bitterness, wrath, and/or vengeance. Those who experience Betrayal also experience Disillusionment and in case you aren't aware of what that is.. It's when something loses value because of disappointment because you realize it isn't as good as what you thought it was. This is the worse when it comes to relationships, even though it can happen like "buyers remorse" with a product that doesn't live up to the quality it was portrayed as. I think disillusionment is the most common with politics.. Since people base their entire life on a candidate or philosophy and then it turns out to be corrupted or falls apart over time. Some may argue that it is religion, however religion has a much better efficiency of maintaining itself through dissonance. It is hard to find a person who experiences facts about their religious views that cause them to drop it instead of legitimize the negativity.

Now there are a few ways Disdain can be handled.. I only advocate that any individual analyzes their feelings and thoughts before making any decision. Sometimes a positive outcome can be reached by simply giving their choice some time to be weighed against other choices. Regardless of the choice, I do hope all to be well in the end; primarily that growth occurs from the pain and also any negativity resulting from a bad choice.

In the mean time..
When you experience the Surprise of an event and then experience Disdain, don't be quick to assume that the Disillusionment of something that may be a matter of Betrayal is anything less or more than your own expectations. I am not saying that your expectations have no merit, I am saying that humans tend to give more weight to a situation in either a positive or negative way based on their unspoken expectations.
When it comes to relationships, it doesn't pay to assume anything or to expect more than what is mutual. There are certain things that shouldn't need to be conveyed, like honesty and sincerity, but in this world it is all too common to be acquainted with people who don't take you seriously just as they have a bunch of conditions to keep things positive. Sometimes the end of a friendship or romance comes from having a difference of opinion about a celebrity; which is the most ridiculous kind of reasoning to have in my opinion.
Other times you have to deal with a complexity that has roots in how a family unit functions harmoniously.

Just be ready for the times when you feel betrayed and disillusioned.
Don't be surprised by everything.. Conversely, don't assume anything.

Silence for the Fool

There are times when Silence is appropriate.
Most people think of silence as quiet time, such as while watching a movie, reading a book, or meditating. These are all appropriate times for silence, a mannerism that is suggestive of the event itself and respected by onlookers as much as those in the 'moment'. However, there are times when silence is warranted, appropriate even, but not desired. I am talking about the times when silence is the only way to get your point across or when silence is the only way to keep from escalating a situation into negativity.

I have a hard time being silent in the face of negativity or malice. Those are the times when my mind runs around in circles and I am more inclined to help someone put their foot in their mouth, pushing until they are eating up to their knee. The irony to me is that most people don't realize that they are fighting against an undeniable truth or an ideology that they are failing to disprove. Usually it's those times that topics are derailed and bunny trails become as numerous as American Highways, the people finding the importance of the bunny trails also finding themselves speeding down them as if they are in a hurry to get somewhere.

With my recent discussions with people who are totally against my conclusions of reality, which are based on experience and what science can prove, I have found it very disturbing that I have to admit that I'm dealing with foolishness.
I am against the idea that any individual be completely open minded. I believe in the power of listening and civil disagreement, but I can not say that having an open mind is always beneficial. It really depends on the situation and what having an open mind means. If by having an open mind I am to disregard all notions of confirmed truth in favor of hearing someone ramble about the voracity of lies, then I have an obligation to let them know I simply do not agree and why. I don't have to be pessimistic, degrading, or otherwise unresponsive. However, some people do not understand the value of agreeing to disagree and moving on. It is during these times that I have to maintain Silence for the Fool.

To call someone a Fool is not desirable. I don't like it and I don't think it is a good choice of words, but there comes a time when that's the only thing going through my head. It resounds in my heart for a reason, a reason that leaves me unsettled about the conversation and distraught with the inability to end the conversation so that I can focus my energy on being compassionate.
For the people who must have the last word, silence is the best form of gentle revenge. Maybe revenge is a misnomer for what is truly taking place, but I have no better way of explaining my feelings coupled with my intent. As my intent is to let the last words be left in the mouth of the other person, meaning I don't confirm agreement or disagreement even though it may be completely perceived as agreement. As the intent is to let the person find out the truth regardless of their memory to recall my words in any exactness of what was said.

These times come up a lot when dealing with certain topics. The problem isn't a lack of civility, it is a total presence of Cognitive Dissonance. Something of which I have to accept the possibility that I may be going through also. The ironic thing to me is that I go through it more when I'm presented with information that I have knowledge on, even though it may be incomplete and working against my ability to understand new information. So the essence of my silence is that I look at myself as being the Fool when I realize I'm arguing/defending information that is faulty. The rejection of a rebuttal is when I feel I am being open minded, even if not easily persuaded from my deductions.

I used to get really frustrated with having to be silent so I could practice the art of listening.
My moments of frustration are heightened when I am truly trying to have certain questions answered and I am mocked for it. After all, who likes to be told their wrong, try to accept new information patiently and openly, then be mocked for not knowing certain facts that aren't absolutely obvious?
Humility, patience, and gentleness are great allies in those times..

Despite the appropriateness for working to agreement, there are times when we have to face the stark reality that there wont be an agreement or civil disagreement. So it is best to be silent and thought of as a fool than to open our mouths and remove all doubt.

A Hard Head Makes a Soft Butt

Who has heard of that saying?
I have and I have certainly experienced what it means.
Granted, I am one stubborn dude in many ways that I'd rather not get into.

I don't look at discipline as some force of evil or the harbinger of failure. There's different kinds of discipline in my book, the only kind that should be feared is that from people who have no interest in you maturing through the process. The only reason why I think those kind of people should be feared is because they get into a position of authority and make sure that anything you can be chastised for you suffer the full extent of their wrath in a unfair and cruel sense.
At that point, I wouldn't even call it punishment.. I'd call it torture.
We all have experienced at least one person who is on a power trip, seems to harbor some deep rooted hatred, and listens to your apologies as much as nails scratching across a chalk board. In fact, it would almost seem that our existence to this particular person is malicious to their own existence.

However, the street goes both ways.

We've also dealt with that person who is so unbelievably stubborn that we wonder how they were even pushed out of the womb without the doctors calling in the Fire brigade with the "jaws of life".
These people seem to revel in discipline, so it would seem, because you can tell them what they should and shouldn't do and it's like every word is perceived but it's like trying to get water to soak into a rock. Though it isn't as bad when you're dealing with a person who doesn't groan over every mistake they could have prevented had they took the time to be a sponge instead of a rock.
I myself am the latter, I am stubborn and sometimes I am very receptive to advice.. However, I do not gripe about my losses often. I am very resolved with them in most cases, usually I'm only troubled by that which I have no control over.

Plenty of times in life I have found out the folly of my ways the hard way. I have learned a lot from being able to pick back up and continue in life, with new understanding of why my situation had gone bad. Sometimes more than others, I learned the folly of other people's ways regardless of if or how it affected me personally.
And what else would it matter if I didn't learn things consciously? Most of what we experience is inevitably stored in our subconscious for the constant beat down of our emotions throughout life. It's just that few people in this world learn to stop taking the abuse of their subconscious and even fewer people learn how to sort through what's in it and literally reprogram it to suit their needs.
I can say I am part of those few.. That is, when I'm not willingly evading what is stored up in my subconscious because I'm pretty much giving up on the fight against myself to better myself.

Life has an interesting way with teaching lessons.
I think it is important to take it seriously as much as possible.. Mostly because we don't know what the reason is for going through this process of maturing in every aspect of our existence. Personally, I think there is a design behind it all and it isn't going to stop with death. That's my opinion based on my intuition and it is primarily formed through my experiences and observations of this World and the Universe as a whole; where anyone disagrees is a matter of subjectivity unless you can explain why every living thing is subject to a process of maturity and the law of entropy, simultaneously defying and being defied by the other.

Finally.. There's this little problem I see in the world that is plaguing modern society, and humanity yet again. It isn't the first time the plateau is reached in terms of a society becoming decadent because of the problem, however the problem manifests in various ways and only seems to grow in variance as humanity grows in sophistication in the world.
I am referring to the pursuit of happiness.
Quite frankly I believe that happiness is important to a degree. Total happiness is a farce if you talk about it outside of a state of being that's developed by conscious choice despite circumstances. When people say, "do whatever makes you happy" they set individuals up to perceive happiness as a way of life regardless of the method to get to the means.. I am filled with discontent at that kind of thinking because of what I see people do to obtain that state of being that can be done in the mind alone. Especially since so many people destroy their bodies, minds, and emotions in their frivolous pursuit of an external object to incite an internally occurring phenomenon; as I said, it is something that is of choice and can exist purely as just a choice.
So what do you tell someone that their pursuit for happiness made their external actions reap the harvest of Pain inevitably? Shall you say that their pain is their happiness? Maybe if they are masochistic.. Then again, even people like that I look further into the past so see if they were conditioned to think in such a manner or if they were truly born masochistic.
Regardless, my questions mean nothing in light of the average person and the point I'm making about discipline.

Life is not a place of constant happiness that's determined by how many rainbows, singing birds or sugary treats surrounding us. It is not a constant upheaval of good things either. Life is a myriad of things, a diverse cornucopia of good and bad and neutral. Whatever the original design of the Universe was, is still relevant now. Whatever has been added that shouldn't be, by whatever source with the authority to do so, is irrelevant when an individual has to decide how they will make a difference in anything.
All that matters is that each individual be given the chance to change. I would say that every individual should be disciplined.. However, there's no need if nothing needs to be changed. So let us focus more on the idea that we humans should put our energy into changing ourselves instead of trying to change everything else around us.

True change comes from within.
Fight it and you'll find your hard head led to a tenderized behind.